Still Searching

Have you ever had decisions and you just could not seem to make up your mind? Times where each day you wake up with a new plan only to completely start over with a new thought the next morning?

I am this way about three things these days… and it is driving me CRAZY.

There are three MAJOR decisions in our world that I am debating internally – and have been for months. And I know that God is not a God of confusion – so my wackiness about these decisions makes me think the Lord has not led yet – because when He leads – it will become clearer. 

My job here is just to be patient, to be wise, to be so close to my Father that I can feel when He shifts directions, and to wait on Him. I am not so great at the waiting part – and I am absolutely terrible at the patience part.

I just want us to be wise – and do what is best. And I know that if we follow our Lord – we can’t be “out of His will” – we just need to discern His best path. And I know that this time of waiting – this frustrating wacky irritating time that seems to do nothing but drive me more and more batty – is not only for my good, but may be better for me and more important for me and my soul than the outcome of any of the three decisions. 

And so I sit here – and I wait – and I try not to drive my husband crazy as I shift with each breeze that blows. And I covet the prayers of anyone like me who is struggling with these things. Lord please illuminate our next step… and help me to trust You with all of the steps beyond the next one.

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